Best Lawyer Story

The United Way realized that it had never received a donation from
the city's most successful lawyer. So a United Way volunteer paid the
lawyer a visit in his lavish office.
The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, 'Our research shows
that even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you
don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something
back to your community through the United Way ?'
The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, 'First, did your research
also show you that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness
and she has huge medical bills that are far beyond her ability to
pay?'
Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbles, 'Uh . . . no, I didn't know that.'
'Secondly,' says the lawyer, 'did it show that my brother, a
disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair and is unable
to support his wife and six children?'
The stricken United Way rep begins to stammer an apology, but is
cut off again.
'Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's husband
died in dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage
and three children, one of whom is disabled and another that has
learning disabilities requiring an array of private tutors?'
The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, says, 'I'm so
sorry, I had no idea.'
And the lawyer says, 'So . . . if I didn't give any money to
them, what makes you think I'd give any to you?